Jenny Novak Publications

Emergency Manager | Speaker | Writer

Tag: resiliency

Lessons I’ve Learned From My 12-week-old

For the past 3 months I have been spending all my time with our 12-week-old daughter, Scarlett. It’s been quite a change of pace for me as I’ve been watching the wildfires take off from the confines of my couch, fighting the urge to get out there and get involved to help coordinate response. My husband JB worked long hours at the Saddle Ridge Local Assistance Center for 4 consecutive days and on the fifth day when he was supposed to be home earlier he had to stay late to work a new EOC activation for the Palisades Fire. This meant more FOMO for me and more hours of one-on-one time with Scarlett. As much as staying home goes against my nature to get out into the field and dive straight into these emergency management challenges, I have tried to really embrace my new, non-permanent role as a stay at home, full-time mother to Scarlett G and use this new lens to expand my viewpoint on the human experience.

Having spent every day and night of her life with her so far, I have had the priceless opportunity to watch a brand new human being emerge from the womb, adjust to a shockingly different environment, and begin to grow into a little person who tries to communicate. It has been nothing short of miraculous. I recently took some time to reflect on what she has shown me firsthand about the innate abilities of human beings to adapt and overcome the incredulous challenge of being helpless, immobile, and incapable of speaking in a massive obstacle-laden landscape. Before we fill our worlds with layers of experiences and years of learning, what are the native traits that we develop immediately, to cope with such a traumatic transformation as transitioning to life outside the womb? Spending time with Scarlett has allowed me a unique ‘back to basics’ perspective on our human resilience before it is colored by the complexities of adulthood. She is simply trying to survive, and it’s been fascinating to watch her develop behaviors that promote growth and endurance in this whole new world.

The thumb.

The Power of Self-Soothing

In the first few weeks after we brought her home from the hospital, Scarlett would sometimes cry unconsolably. As a newborn, crying was really her only way to communicate and I am sure there were many things that she found frightening and uncomfortable about her new home. It used to take mom and dad spending serious time rocking her, swaddling her, cuddling her or speaking to her softly to get her to calm down. But as she has grown, she has found her own way to calm herself down and has gained a very powerful tool. My baby sucks her thumb, and it instantly pacifies her. She constantly resists the pacifier, which we’ve come to terms with although we still offer it from time to time. Scarlett has learned that her own two lips can form the perfect fit to cradle her thumb and turn it into a readily available calming tool. Now whenever she gets bored, mildly uncomfortable, cranky or tired she will simply turn her head, find her thumb, and breathe a sigh of relief. She puts herself to sleep this way and wakes up in a much better mood! This has really shown me how powerful it is for adults to discover effective tools of self-soothing that we can practice in our daily lives.

Now, I’m definitely not advocating that we suck our thumbs, but it is incredibly empowering to be able to take control of a stressful, irritating mindset and transform it into peace and clarity. Practices such as deep breathing, stretching / yoga, meditation, walking or exercise, writing or reading, going outside, or having a hot cup of tea can really work wonders on helping to soothe our anger, anxiety, or irritation. It is important to try a few soothing mechanisms and learn what works best for you as an individual so that you can keep it in your back pocket as a frontline defense when you are thrown into high-stress, crisis situations. I think coping tools which rely the least on external resources are the most reliable since you need only to exercise a behavior within your own reserves. For me, it’s walking that will immediately calm me down. Stretching and deep breathing also help me to eradicate stress and center myself during times of crisis.

Big smiles.

The Power of a Smile

I struggle to identify when Scarlett’s first smile occurred because I feel like she has been smiling since day one. But she has certainly learned to utilize her smile as a tool to break the ice with new people and to melt mom and dad’s hearts into giving her whatever she wants. It might seem simple, but I think there is an important lesson behind the fact that smiling is one of the earliest behaviors that babies develop. A smile is the gateway to friendship, to developing social capital with other humans around you. As a helpless baby, she’s learned quickly that smiling gets people to smile back at her and emit affection and love. Smiling gets people on her side. I have noticed this as her mom as well that walking around with a smiling baby instantly endears me to strangers at the grocery store or on the streets. People who would normally walk by me with their hardened big city expressions, completely open up to me and I feel more welcomed and acknowledged wherever I go.

While it’s very basic, smiling and establishing good relations with our colleagues, neighbors, and fellow human beings is a crucial survival tool. The more that community resilience is studied the more it is shown that having a strong social fabric within a community is correlated with the ability to bounce back more quickly after a disaster or crisis. Exercising good relationships makes us happier people and gives a network to rely on when times get tough. It is also well known within the disaster world that you are most likely to be helped by neighbors or people around you when a disaster occurs since first responders will be spread so thin. A smile today is an investment in your future social capital—it’s easy and completely free.

Tummy time in the backyard.

The Power of the Unknown

New babies spend the majority of their time on their backs exerting minimal energy to look up at people and things around them. When placed on their bellies, babies typically struggle. They have to work extremely hard just to lift their massive heads off the ground and look around. For some reason, Scarlett loves ‘tummy time’ and I think I know why. Even though she must push her neck muscles to new extremes, she is mesmerized by this different perspective on the world around her and will work as hard as she can to be able to access this window into the unknown. From her belly she isn’t stuck staring at ceiling fans and drab white paint. She can see blades of grass, plants, the lower shelves of bookcases, the print on the bedskirt, mommy’s feet, and the detailed pattern of the rug. There is so much to see and discover from this new perspective. The added bonus is that if she works hard enough she will be able to crawl very soon from this position, which will add the whole new dimension of mobility to her human experience.

It’s easy to look at things the way that we always do, the way that we always have. We can simply lie on our backs and see a sterile, clean cut version of the world with minimal complications, where we see the people that choose to come in and out of our scope of vision.  It’s much more challenging to force ourselves to turn around, seek out new places, try new activities, interact with different people, languages, sights and smells. Sometimes we have to take on a new challenge to open up a new dimension of ourselves and unlock the next level of our lives. If you want to someday be able to move up or move on, take some time today to open up a new portal into the world around you by analyzing the challenges you have in front of you, perhaps one that you have been ignoring just because it seems too difficult to even begin to tackle. Think about what it would take to overcome this challenge and begin by taking baby steps toward surmounting it. It’s not about improving what you know, it’s about embracing what you don’t know.

My teacher.

Even though I’m the mommy and she’s the baby, Scarlett G has taught me a lot about the human experience. I hope to be able to use the lessons I’ve gleaned from her survival mechanisms to better my own adult life. When you strip away the complexities of our adult world and truly go back to basics you can discover more than you might have imagine. Even though I’m not jumping out to coordinate the next wildfire response I am learning something new about resilience right here, in my own home. So today I challenge you to practice one of your self-soothing powers, to smile at a stranger and to identify a challenge in your life that you can work to overcome. You never know what new worlds will open up to you on the other side.

Approaching Labor with Resilience

Lessons Learned from a Long Labor

It’s taken me some time to write about Scarlett’s birth and to process the whole experience. It almost goes without saying that these past 2 months have absolutely changed my entire life, yet I am saying it because that fact can also not be understated. Newborn babies are incredibly sweet and angelically cherub-like in their chubby, rosy cheeked aesthetic. Their earliest smiles will pull at your heartstrings in a way that you can never have fully anticipated before you see their little faces and big curious eyes. Yet the first month also brings a suite of new challenges the depth and intensity of which you never fully understood, certainly not leaving much time for anything extra.

But I’m happy to say that now that we are nearing the 2-month mark, we’ve gotten into a pretty good routine that’s allowed me some time to get back to the computer to write. As a follow up to my earlier post on how my experience with cancer affected my outlook on pregnancy, I wanted to share some nuggets of advice now that I’m on the other side of the experience. In short, I was induced and had a 43-hour labor, including 3.5 hours of pushing and a diagnosis of ‘failure to progress’ through the pushing stage. The whole thing ended in a C-section. It wasn’t a great experience, but I’ve bounced back and my little angel is more than worth it. Here are some recommendations I have on what you can do ahead of time to maximize your resiliency through a difficult (or even an easy!) labor.

Education is Empowerment

I went into pregnancy with very little knowledge of what it would be like, and what factors to consider when planning a birth. Like most young American women, I just assumed you go to the hospital and they guide you through it. I thought home births were for new age hippies. I didn’t have many close friends or family who had gone through pregnancy and I had never seen a birth.

The books I referenced throughout my pregnancy.

Like a good former academic, I purchased some books about pregnancy when my pregnancy test first lit up positive. What to Expect When You’re Expecting and the Mayo Clinic Guide to a Healthy Pregnancy were my first purchases. But it was 50 Things To Do Before You Deliver, a light-hearted, brightly colored listicle of a book that brought me to the best resource I discovered during pregnancy. The book suggested listening to birth stories, and specifically recommended a podcast called The Birth Hour. After my first listen, I was hooked—it really changed how I thought about the whole process and broadened my perspective of what birth could be. I was already midway through my second trimester by the time I started listening, but I have to say that it was the single most valuable way that I learned about birth.

Learning through listening to real birth stories from other women allowed me to be exposed to a very wide range of possibilities. It was striking to hear how each experience was unique, yet as I began to listen religiously during my daily walks, I began to pick up on common patterns to labor and delivery. Investing the time in hearing these different perspectives was so much more educational than just reading a medical article or book chapter that listed out different medical interventions or the stages of labor and what to expect. I really felt like I understood how certain decisions—like whether to get an epidural and when, might impact the course and outcome of labor.

I learned why many women chose to go the route of home birth or birthing center rather than hospital, after hearing multiple stories about pushy hospital doctors or the detached, nonpersonal experience of having a stranger who viewed you as a medical record number rather than a person deliver your baby. I listened to women describe how real and beautiful it was to experience all of the feelings throughout the labor—pain, relief, and pure joy. Many women believed they really benefited from developing an understanding of the full capabilities of the body and how we are meant to reproduce by going through the delivery unmedicated.

Another benefit to learning through birth stories is that you are inherently learning through multiple sources. Whenever I delve into a new subject I make sure to use multiple avenues of learning so that I can cross-reference the most salient points from each and get a more informed perspective. We also took a La Maze class through Kaiser, which added another layer to my education. The class didn’t start until I was 35 weeks pregnant, so I was at the tail end of my pregnancy and we weren’t even sure we’d finish if the baby came early. The class reinforced much of what I’d picked up through the Birth Hour and allowed us to practice breathing and movement techniques together. The instructor had given birth 5 times—all unmedicated. She had a strong preference for natural labor but discussed medication options as tools that you could turn to in your toolbox—under certain circumstances they could be very beneficial.

Know Your Birth Philosophy

I recommend becoming educated about the wonderful world of birthing as early as possible. This allows you to choose from the beginning what type of care provider you want to seek—midwife or OBGYN, and to begin advocating for yourself and your birthing preferences up front. You may hear about a Birth Plan and how you need one. You’ll probably find it on the checklists of the pregnancy apps you’re using. Or you may be handed a standard paper birth plan to fill out with check boxes from your doctor’s office, like I was. However, I would advise against developing too rigid of a birth plan. I don’t believe it’s a checkbox kind of activity—these are not simple black or white, yes or no type questions.

The more I reflect on my experiences, it becomes clearer and clearer what a grey world it is. That’s why I recommend understanding the different techniques that might be used, particularly if you are being induced, and evaluating how you feel about each one so that you can develop a sort of birth philosophy rather than a hard and fast plan. In my case, they used a foley balloon to mechanically induce dilation for the first 12 hours of my labor. While it didn’t work well in my case, I’m glad we went this route rather than the cervix softening medications that are sometimes used to start labor. Understand each of the tools in your toolbox and set an overall goal for your experience. Then, you can match your tool selection with the way your labor progresses to help you meet that goal. It is definitely important to have a birth partner / labor coach / doula to discuss this with beforehand, this person should understand how you feel about the different options and be able to advocate on your behalf if you are not able to during labor. Believe me, it can get intense quickly, especially if Pitocin is involved, and your ability to have a rational conversation may be greatly diminished.

The Birth Vision Board I created.

In my case, my birth philosophy was to approach the experience as naturally as circumstances would allow but I was not against utilizing pain medications if my labor became particularly long or difficult. I researched alternative pain relief measures and prepared to use tools such as aromatherapy, visualization, music, massage, breathing, and movement. I was against being induced, but given my doctor’s stern recommendation that I was at high risk of developing preeclampsia due to my pre-existing chronic hypertension, I was willing to undergo induction. However, I was not comfortable with inducing any earlier than 40 weeks, despite her initial recommendation of doing it at 38 or 39 weeks. Due to hearing the many induction stories on the Birth Hour I was well aware that beginning labor through medical methods often leads to a ‘cascade’ of medical interventions until the baby is born. Knowing this beforehand, I came to terms with the fact that I would be a lot more likely to ask for the epidural if I was induced—I had heard time and time again about how Pitocin can create extremely intense contractions as the chemical forces your uterus to contract, and often does this overly well.

Having a birth philosophy ended up suiting me very well. I did not feel like I had failed when I asked for the epidural about 24 hours into my labor when I had failed to progress in dilation at all (I was 1.5 the entire time) and was exhausted by the frequency and intensity of the Pitocin induced contractions. With the epidural, not only was I able to get some rest overnight, my body was also relaxed enough to dilate to 10 centimeters. I’m not sure if I would’ve gotten there without it.

A year earlier I had used my emergency management skills to plan my own wedding, developing a full event action plan complete with a down to the minute timeline, set up diagrams, contact rosters and organizational charts. Unlike weddings, birth is one of the few things in today’s perfectly planned, calendar-centric world where you cannot anticipate the timing and progression of events. It was both freeing and a little intimidating going into the birth experience knowing that I must relinquish control of the process. My baby and my body would guide me through and I had to trust them. For our La Maze class, we were instructed to identify an object to serve as a ‘focal point’ during our breathing and laboring. I decided to make a vision board with relaxing imagery and motivational quotes. One of the phrases I selected was: Birth isn’t scripted, it unfolds. And through 5 weeks of practicing with the focal point in LaMaze, I think I truly came to believe it.

This mentality helped me greatly when the doctors recommended that I be moved to the operating room for a Cesarean Section after nearly 4 hours of pushing. While my birth philosophy had always involved a preference for birthing through a vaginal delivery, I knew in the back of my mind that a C-section was a possibility. My own birth was via C-section, and I had known a few friends recently who had to give birth this way even though it was not planned. One in three births in the United States occur via C-section, and I knew that even though Kaiser prided themselves on having a lower rate than most and doing everything they could to encourage vaginal deliveries, the possibility was there. I remained calm and was, at that point, grateful that we were most definitely going to meet our baby very shortly.

Cultivate Endurance

One of the reasons I was able to remain calm and matter of fact during a time when the doctors said many women are in tears and extremely frightened, was because I took some time during my third trimester to reflect on my strengths. Going into labor, I wanted to visualize myself as strong, as a survivor. Writing has always helped me process things and create deeper understanding in my own life, so I wrote about how my experience as a cancer survivor shaped my mentality as I approached labor. While not everyone may have as dramatic of an experience to reflect on as I did, I challenge you to think critically about life experiences where you were strong–physically or emotionally–and channel that inner strength as you go into labor.

Our LaMaze teacher told us that she would rather give birth than have strep throat. In her experience, strep throat was way more painful. I think most of us were skeptical about this, given the many horror stories out there about labor and the way that it is depicted in popular culture. But, her point was that this pain has an end game, it has a purpose, whereas illnesses and broken bones do not. You can recall an experience like an illness, injury, training for a marathon or sport, or even getting through a difficult divorce where you were resilient and use that documented example to show yourself why you will get through labor.

After a yoga class in my third trimester.

In addition to using a past example, you can also strive to cultivate endurance while you’re pregnant. Doctors recommend walking and other moderate exercise while pregnant as healthful for both mom and baby. As you get further along it can feel pretty challenging just to walk for 30 minutes, especially if there are hills or heat waves involved! As you continue to conquer physical milestones during your pregnancy you will be creating an endurance in your body that can be called upon during delivery. Yoga and meditation have also been shown to promote wellness in pregnant women, and fostering this strength of mind-body connection can work wonders on boosting your stamina during labor. I walked pretty much every day right up until the date of my induction, and practiced yoga regularly throughout my pregnancy—both of which I credit with helping me build the power to push for nearly four hours.

While I was ultimately unsuccessful, I have not let that bring me dismay. My baby’s positioning wasn’t great—her feet were crammed way up in my left ribcage for the entire second stage of labor and she refused to budge even though the nurses told me I was pushing correctly (as evidenced by the three stools I passed in the process!). I chalk it up to her not being ready, and the induction process as a whole not being effective in convincing her it was time to make her appearance. But the important thing is that she is here! Her apgar scores of 8 and 9 upon birth and she was happily average on all accounts, well except for her thick mop of lovely hair.

Already smiling on the day of her birth!

In this post, I’ve tried to summarize some of the main takeaways, but if you’re interested in more details on my lengthy labor, you’re welcome to read my full birth story (be aware it is 8 pages long!!).

Coverage of 2016 Zombie Preparedness Scavenger Hunt

Zombies greeted students at checkpoints during the Zombie Preparedness Scavenger Hunt. Photo by Lee Choo.

CSUN Prepares for Anything, Including the Zombie Apocalypse

Coverage of 2016 Beat the Quake Event

Students shake fear of earthquake disaster

CSUN students practice safety tactics in an earthquake simulator for the “Beat the Quake” event at the Bayramian lawn April 28. From left, Senior Nestor Nieves, Junior Salvador Perez, Senior Kimberlu Antezana, and visiting participant Bridgett. Photo credit: Sarai Henry

Sundial Newspaper, April 28 2016

In 1994, Northridge suffered an earthquake with a 6.7 magnitude. Given the lack of recent earthquakes, it would seem Northridge is due for a tremor, which leaves some individuals on edge.